Saturday, September 6, 2008
Tuesday, August 5, 2008
Invisible tears
Would you ever know how much I'm hurting inside,
Not being able to be who I am,
I've been pretending for such a long time,
I've forgotten the face behind the mask.
A constant sadness lingers within this heart,
Not knowing where to turn to for help.
The light at the end of the tunnel grows dimmer each day.
Is this fate or is this some kind of joke God is playing on me?
I'll never ever know. For now... I can't give up...
Not for those who is watching me act my play.
Take me away... out of this darkness... the dark abyss deep within my soul...
Not being able to be who I am,
I've been pretending for such a long time,
I've forgotten the face behind the mask.
A constant sadness lingers within this heart,
Not knowing where to turn to for help.
The light at the end of the tunnel grows dimmer each day.
Is this fate or is this some kind of joke God is playing on me?
I'll never ever know. For now... I can't give up...
Not for those who is watching me act my play.
Take me away... out of this darkness... the dark abyss deep within my soul...
Saturday, July 26, 2008
Another Beginning to the End
Its the end of my winter holidays, 3yrd year in uni and final undergraduate semester starts on Monday. Sadly time passes so quick. Deep inside I really hope it would end soon yet... another part of me hesitates to looking forward to the future. I guess its a part of me that remains unchanging... that hates change. One of my loved friends is leaving melb for good. It really saddens me to know that this may even be our last goodbye. Thinking about all the times I COULD have spent together with these dear friends really leaves the tears hanging at the corner of my eye. Its a part of life I know, friends come and go. I know this dear friend is a really true friend to me... more true than most of the friends that I've made over the past 20 years since I've been breathing the air around me.
Life's not always about ups... there's always downs, somehow it always feel like its going down for me. But with friends like the ones I have they make my days. Just spending every hour, minute and second, just talking, laughing and crying with them makes every time spent in my life so worthwhile. I love you guys so much. Without you guys I'm really nothing. To my very special friend. I hope you would leave this place with no regrets and wish you well in whatever you pursue in the future. I would always look forward to meeting you one day in the future. I would be waiting for that day. We love you so much. You are my true friend and sister. You are... irreplaceable in my heart. The memories we spent with you would always be engraved deep in my heart.
This song has been in my heart. Yea I'm no japanese but still I do appreciate different type of music. Not trying to be a wannabe here. Gonna stop here. Soon to be updated I guess.
Life's not always about ups... there's always downs, somehow it always feel like its going down for me. But with friends like the ones I have they make my days. Just spending every hour, minute and second, just talking, laughing and crying with them makes every time spent in my life so worthwhile. I love you guys so much. Without you guys I'm really nothing. To my very special friend. I hope you would leave this place with no regrets and wish you well in whatever you pursue in the future. I would always look forward to meeting you one day in the future. I would be waiting for that day. We love you so much. You are my true friend and sister. You are... irreplaceable in my heart. The memories we spent with you would always be engraved deep in my heart.
This song has been in my heart. Yea I'm no japanese but still I do appreciate different type of music. Not trying to be a wannabe here. Gonna stop here. Soon to be updated I guess.
Sunday, June 8, 2008
Home
Darn it... wanted to go to the library today. Found out it closes at 5pm today... and its already 1pm so no point going. Sigh forgot its the Queen's birthday today. I wonder what do they do to celebrate it? I don't think its as grand as the Sultan of Brunei's birthday... ah memories, school line-ups (kids fainting, whining etc.) parades, ah felt like such a long time ago since that happened. Kinda missing all the fun times now. Not the time to be reminiscing though. Gotta try and focus on my studies! Gah motivation please come to possess me! I need the grades :(
Apartment Hunting
Sigh so much to do so little time. Apparently my housemate is leaving us soon cause she's almost done with her Masters degree. Really glad for her. Another change about to happen, its all just happening too fast. Felt like just yesterday I just moved in, got to know my lovely housemate. Yes, we have had our differences. But I'll always enjoy every moment we went around giggling, playing with each other(not in a naughty way) to the way we just loved to talk about things, about life itself, dreams, hopes and futures. That would absolutely be missed by me. It feels as if, I'm going to lose this sister of mine, that I've known for 3 and a half years. I admit I haven't been the best housemate, always disappearing and living somewhere else. Oh well, best few years of my life ever since I left the "Abode of Peace". Life has its cruel ways of taking things you've grown so accustomed to and leaving you to just learn to live with it.
Anyways, it would probably be a busy day tomorrow. Provided my sister and me do get along and make a big effort in searching for a new home. We've already set our sights on some apartments on rent in the city area. Costly but nothing much that can be done with the current rates that are going up and up. Hopefully we'd pick this place that I like which is in between uni and the city. Then I can wake up just a tad bit later before I head off to uni. This is totally a wrong time to go apartment hunting but I guess due to procastination and laziness, this is what we get. Exams are nearing and we have yet to decide where to move. I haven't even packed. So doomed. Sigh just wish I were back home where I'm pampered and carefree. Yes I admit, I am SPOILED. Just as most of the kids back home are. Oh well till another day, soon really soon to be updated.
The three of us. On my birthday 2006. Such memories... bliss.
Anyways, it would probably be a busy day tomorrow. Provided my sister and me do get along and make a big effort in searching for a new home. We've already set our sights on some apartments on rent in the city area. Costly but nothing much that can be done with the current rates that are going up and up. Hopefully we'd pick this place that I like which is in between uni and the city. Then I can wake up just a tad bit later before I head off to uni. This is totally a wrong time to go apartment hunting but I guess due to procastination and laziness, this is what we get. Exams are nearing and we have yet to decide where to move. I haven't even packed. So doomed. Sigh just wish I were back home where I'm pampered and carefree. Yes I admit, I am SPOILED. Just as most of the kids back home are. Oh well till another day, soon really soon to be updated.
The three of us. On my birthday 2006. Such memories... bliss.
Friday, June 6, 2008
Bored
Am bored so gonna do this questionnaire which I stole from Lois's blog, who had stolen it from Sharon's friendster so here it goes:
1.Do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
* Mmmmm... maybe.... white lies are always the best ;)
2.Where were you last night?
* At home. Snoring away.
3.What is today’s date?
* 07/06/2008
4.Who was the last person to call you baby/babe?
* Recently by my darlings ;) bwahhaha Don't know lots of girlfriends call me babe =/
5.Anyone crushing on you?
* Hrmmm if I knew I would have said it already -.-
6.What is your relationship status?
* Single?
7.Has anyone ever sang to you?
* Well Annabel and Kiwi would always sing to me "Unbreak My Heart" whenever they made
me feel sad.... lol in a funny wayyy.
8.Has anyone ever given you roses?
* Yeaps :)
9.Who do you text the most?:
* Leong Jia Hui >.>
10.How do you make your money?
* Lol I ain't got no money *sings "The Way I Are"* I'm just a freeloader :)
11.First person to text today?
* Let me see.... the person no.9?
12.What is your favorite color?
* I all colours of the world! Preeeeettyyyy~
13.What color are your eyes?
* Let me see... last time I checked they were red.. Dark brown.
14.What is a compliment you receive often?
* You've got long sexy legs! Oh and a horrible off tune voice :)
15.How tall are you?:
* Medium :D Me >>>> Lois & Sharon BWAHHAHAHAHAH >=)
16.Who was the last person to say they loved you and when?
* Kiwi poo said she loves me!!! Over the phone a few days ago :D
17.Do you like your parents?
* Duh!
18.Do you secretly like someone?:
* Most definitely
19.Why did your last relationship end?
* What relationship? How come I know nothing of it!
20.Who was the last person you said you loved on the phone?
* Of course would be person 16. :)
* Don’t remember if I’ve even said it to anyone on the phone
21.Which do you prefer, to eat or sleep?
* I'd rather eat! Sleep = waste of time.... I'd rather do none actually! Both makes
me FAT.
22.Do you look more like your mom or your dad?
* Hmmmmmm might be my dad.
23.How long does it take you to shower?
* 20-30 minutes? What can I say I like my lil shower time :D
24.Can you do splits?
* Hrmmm my hair can split... does that count? rofl
25.Are you flexible?
* Flexible physically NO. But in terms of personality I'd say prob. Any la... my fav
word ;D
26.Can you speak any other language than English?
* Malay. A bit of horrible chinese.
27.What is the last letter of your middle name?
* Hrmmmm I suppose its "w"
28.How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
* Around 5-6? I'm not much of a sleeper! Like i said in 21.
29.Do you wear your seatbelt in the car?:
* Yea I'm always afraid of people's driving. Even my own =/
30.Are you scared of flying?
* Hrmmm... I take pills before I fly. Question answered?
31.What do you sleep in?
* Depends I usually like to slip into PJs.
32.Who was the last person you kissed?
* Hrmmmmm..... I don't remember... It was all a blur.
33.Do you like funny people or serious people?
* Of course funny people. Can't take the stress from serious people! :X
34.What are you listening to?
* Me typing :/
35.What do you have planned for tonight?
* Dinner with bunch of library peeps! Exams are nearrrrrrrrrrr.
36.Is the last person you kissed older than you?
* Don't think so. Like I said it was a blur.
37.Do you have a favorite item of clothing?
* Underwear *blushes* lol
38.Do you like messages or comments better?
* I'd rather get comments >.< so that I'll figure out whats wrong with me.
39.Last movie you saw in theaters?
* Oh yea baby~ It was Superhero Movie or sth... lameness!
40.Last thing you ate?
* Shin Ram Yun noodles. YUMMM~
41.What was last thing you drank?
* A&W Rootbeer :D
42.Are you happy right now?
* Define happy. If its that fluffy feeling inside you. Then definitely NO.
43.If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
* One thing... I guess money. Money = no work = more time to just laze around.
44.Who makes you happiest right now?
* I wonder... looking for that person now... anyone help me find him? I've pasted him
on Lost & Found Notice.
45.What were you doing at midnight last night?
* Probably on GoonZu.
46.Are you left handed?
* I'm always right ;)
47.What was for dinner tonight?
* Donno yet. Its tea-time :/
48.What is the last thing you thought about?
* About how late I am in going to the library? Gosh I'm late
49.When is your birthday?
* 25/08/1987
50.Do you want to get married & have children one day?
* Every woman's fairytale dream... well in my point of view :)
BLAHH DONE! Hmm hope that amused you as much as I amused my self answering them. Anyways life's boring cause I'm stuck here.
More updates. More Pics to come soon. :)
1.Do you swear to tell the truth the whole truth and nothing but the truth?
* Mmmmm... maybe.... white lies are always the best ;)
2.Where were you last night?
* At home. Snoring away.
3.What is today’s date?
* 07/06/2008
4.Who was the last person to call you baby/babe?
* Recently by my darlings ;) bwahhaha Don't know lots of girlfriends call me babe =/
5.Anyone crushing on you?
* Hrmmm if I knew I would have said it already -.-
6.What is your relationship status?
* Single?
7.Has anyone ever sang to you?
* Well Annabel and Kiwi would always sing to me "Unbreak My Heart" whenever they made
me feel sad.... lol in a funny wayyy.
8.Has anyone ever given you roses?
* Yeaps :)
9.Who do you text the most?:
* Leong Jia Hui >.>
10.How do you make your money?
* Lol I ain't got no money *sings "The Way I Are"* I'm just a freeloader :)
11.First person to text today?
* Let me see.... the person no.9?
12.What is your favorite color?
* I all colours of the world! Preeeeettyyyy~
13.What color are your eyes?
* Let me see... last time I checked they were red.. Dark brown.
14.What is a compliment you receive often?
* You've got long sexy legs! Oh and a horrible off tune voice :)
15.How tall are you?:
* Medium :D Me >>>> Lois & Sharon BWAHHAHAHAHAH >=)
16.Who was the last person to say they loved you and when?
* Kiwi poo said she loves me!!! Over the phone a few days ago :D
17.Do you like your parents?
* Duh!
18.Do you secretly like someone?:
* Most definitely
19.Why did your last relationship end?
* What relationship? How come I know nothing of it!
20.Who was the last person you said you loved on the phone?
* Of course would be person 16. :)
* Don’t remember if I’ve even said it to anyone on the phone
21.Which do you prefer, to eat or sleep?
* I'd rather eat! Sleep = waste of time.... I'd rather do none actually! Both makes
me FAT.
22.Do you look more like your mom or your dad?
* Hmmmmmm might be my dad.
23.How long does it take you to shower?
* 20-30 minutes? What can I say I like my lil shower time :D
24.Can you do splits?
* Hrmmm my hair can split... does that count? rofl
25.Are you flexible?
* Flexible physically NO. But in terms of personality I'd say prob. Any la... my fav
word ;D
26.Can you speak any other language than English?
* Malay. A bit of horrible chinese.
27.What is the last letter of your middle name?
* Hrmmmm I suppose its "w"
28.How many hours of sleep did you get last night?
* Around 5-6? I'm not much of a sleeper! Like i said in 21.
29.Do you wear your seatbelt in the car?:
* Yea I'm always afraid of people's driving. Even my own =/
30.Are you scared of flying?
* Hrmmm... I take pills before I fly. Question answered?
31.What do you sleep in?
* Depends I usually like to slip into PJs.
32.Who was the last person you kissed?
* Hrmmmmm..... I don't remember... It was all a blur.
33.Do you like funny people or serious people?
* Of course funny people. Can't take the stress from serious people! :X
34.What are you listening to?
* Me typing :/
35.What do you have planned for tonight?
* Dinner with bunch of library peeps! Exams are nearrrrrrrrrrr.
36.Is the last person you kissed older than you?
* Don't think so. Like I said it was a blur.
37.Do you have a favorite item of clothing?
* Underwear *blushes* lol
38.Do you like messages or comments better?
* I'd rather get comments >.< so that I'll figure out whats wrong with me.
39.Last movie you saw in theaters?
* Oh yea baby~ It was Superhero Movie or sth... lameness!
40.Last thing you ate?
* Shin Ram Yun noodles. YUMMM~
41.What was last thing you drank?
* A&W Rootbeer :D
42.Are you happy right now?
* Define happy. If its that fluffy feeling inside you. Then definitely NO.
43.If you could have one thing right now what would it be?
* One thing... I guess money. Money = no work = more time to just laze around.
44.Who makes you happiest right now?
* I wonder... looking for that person now... anyone help me find him? I've pasted him
on Lost & Found Notice.
45.What were you doing at midnight last night?
* Probably on GoonZu.
46.Are you left handed?
* I'm always right ;)
47.What was for dinner tonight?
* Donno yet. Its tea-time :/
48.What is the last thing you thought about?
* About how late I am in going to the library? Gosh I'm late
49.When is your birthday?
* 25/08/1987
50.Do you want to get married & have children one day?
* Every woman's fairytale dream... well in my point of view :)
BLAHH DONE! Hmm hope that amused you as much as I amused my self answering them. Anyways life's boring cause I'm stuck here.
More updates. More Pics to come soon. :)
Thursday, June 5, 2008
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